Category Archives: Children in Shadow of His Wings Orphanage

Caty’s Refuge Chapter 8

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Caty’s Refuge Chapter 8

A New Family

Joanne and I had our antennas up for an environment to help with Caty’s emotional and mental development. Six years after she joined the Shadow family, I emailed our Guatemalan missionaries asking for options The next day, we received a call from a missionary couple who listened to Caty’s history and determined they could minister to her. They even considered adopting her into their family of two small children. Both wanted to fully invest themselves in her to help her recovery from the tragic past. After much discussion, meetings, and referrals, we released her into their custody. Caty, now 18, no longer belonged under the regulations of the children’s court. The transfer would move quickly. 

     Caty’s first meeting with the family took my breath away. We agreed to join them in Guatemala City for the final test, Caty’s reaction to them. When the couple and baby entered the room, Caty focused on the child and softly kissed the top of her head, did her giggle act, and ducked her head. She leaned up against the mother and looked ready to go. 

     “Caty, would you like to live with this family?” I said.

     With her mouth partway open, she licked her lips and moved closer to the mother.

     “I think that is a yes,” I said. “Okay, Caty, you won’t go this time because we need to pack your clothes and personal items. They will come and get you when everything is ready.” Her lips turned down when we left, and she did her slow plod behind me.

     We decided to give Caty all new clothes to help ease that burden on the family. I took her to the storeroom and pulled out a suitcase. 

     “You need some new tennis shoes. Pick out a pair from these.”

     Caty grabbed some and threw them into the suitcase. 

     “No, chic mia, try them on first.”

     She looked over the tops and picked out the most colorful ones. Her tee-hees filled the room while she tried on her selection. To her, Christmas had come. We returned to the casita with a full bag, where her inquisitive sisters waited. Caty seized the moment and explained to them about everything in her luggage.

     “Mira zapatos mios.” On she went for each item. I had never seen her say so much at one time and regretted we didn’t have it on video. 

      “We need to give her a going away party, “ Joanne said.

     Plans went into action, and the reality that she would leave walloped me. I felt reluctant to release her, but the time had come for the experience of a fuller life, and Caty deserved a grand farewell. 

     The older girls and house mothers set up the party on the basketball court. Caty’s shiny eyes and titters reflected how special she felt. The hugs and goodbyes with the house parents and children followed with many tears. Still, Caty continued to smile and be giddy, ready for her new venture. 

     Close communication followed with updates on Caty’s adjustment. The honeymoon period fell flat within a few weeks, and Caty resisted anything they encouraged. She wanted to sit on a bench and not move for the whole day and didn’t respond to anybody. Even the baby could not bring her around. 

     Initially, Caty told them more stories of her gory past. Donna showed Caty some pictures, and Caty pointed to one and called her Daniela. She described how Daniela killed her baby, and blood covered everything. Another time, Caty said a girl named Tabitha had been burned with hot water. This was the first time she called people from her past by names. Then Caty escaped into her hiding place and shut out everything else. The task became more complicated than the couple imagined, and even though their hearts wanted to minister to her, they could not do it. 

     What triggered Caty into past memories? Did she experience pain in missing her Shadow family? We listened to the family’s desperation and resolved Caty needed to return to Shadow. 

     Weeks later, another plan developed for Caty to live with an older single teacher. Caty had a close relationship with Tia Myra, and it seemed an excellent opportunity for her to learn life skills—one-on-one. They would live in Monjas so Caty could be around the people she loved. The Project helped with the expenses, and the arrangement would be an extension of the orphanage to help with Caty’s particular needs. Within weeks, the woman confessed she could not continue. We crossed that one off the list and moved Caty back to the Home. 

Community Ministry

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The vision for James Project of Latin America included having the children involved in community ministry. They had been on the receiving end of ministry and needed to understand the importance of making a difference in the lives of others. I didn’t know how the kids would feel ministering to others nor how the community would respond to them, but we were about to find out.

Our church helped start a church in La Rinconada, a little town that sits halfway up a mountain from Monjas. This aldea (town) consisted of a few homes and had the reputation for witchcraft activity. We heard stories of people in Monjas hiring a witch from this area to pray for healing for themselves or a family member. Others hired witches to put curses on an enemy. Many people thought there needed to be a church, but because of fear, the idea never took root. Pastor Josue* and his wife were members of our church and felt the Lord’s leading to establish the first church in this area. We desired to assist and encourage them.

Our pastor, people from Shadow, and many church members planned an event that fitted well under the title “Occupy.” Many times in the Bible God spoke to the people to occupy a specific area in His Name. The story of the Israelites going into the Promised Land took place according to God’s command to those people. The little metal building being used for the church needed declaration over it as God’s church. We determined to come against the enemy, who had terrorized that area for generations. Although it was a dangerous town, we knew that if God had called us to this place, He would provide protection for all of us. That thought quieted the concerns I had, but I resolved that we would be cautious and use the wisdom God gave us.

The girls decorated Shadow’s school bus, and armed with Bibles, kids, house parents, and music blaring, we went to La Rinconada. As I drove my car up the winding road, I shouted to the girls in the car, “Look at that!” I pointed up to the sky. We saw huge rays coming down from around the clouds forming a portal. Listening to the excited murmurs, I strongly felt God’s love and favor over us.

Scan 5The girls had been prepped in what to do, and, upon our arrival, they all took their stations. Some of the older girls stayed outside to encourage the curious to come inside for the service. Our men stood as guards in various places around them. Some of the other girls ushered people to a chair. Praise and worship soon echoed over the mountain, drawing a larger crowd of people to see what was causing so much commotion. Shouts of invitation went out to them to join us inside for a time with the Lord. Soon all of the plastic chairs were filled and pushed tightly together, leaving little of the concrete floor uncovered. The girls ministered in prayer and gave words of encouragement to the townspeople who went to the altar. I loved watching the kids feeding into the lives of others.

After the service, our cars caravanned behind the bus, while we prayed for the new church and the community. A selection of teens from church carried a torch jogging in front of the bus[ Did they job in front of the bus?? You need to say.]. After a certain distance, they passed the torch off to another group of teens, and continued in this manner until we all reached our home church in Monjas. In our hands, hanging out of the windows, many of us had Ziploc bags filled with oil. We anointed the area with the oil as we drove, representing the presence of the Holy Spirit. The singing, shouting of praises, and horn honking sent out the message of the Lord’s presence. The intentions of all the activity became part of the local gossip within hours of our travels up to the church and back. Everyone then knew about the new church, and the Shadow girls experienced community ministry.

*Name has been changed.

Switch Them: Part 2

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http://www.livingundertheshadowofhiswings.com/2016/02/switch-them-part-1/

I sat with frustrated house parents and an agitated girl, praying for insight for a volatile situation. This situation needed to be defused, and I did not know how to do that. Lord, I need you to guide me in how to deal with all of this. I had listened to the parents describing the disrespect and hurtful words hurled at them by the young teenager Karla*. Karla had confided in me that unfair accusations were being made against her. This cycle had gone on for over a year, and I needed to act now.

Vilma* waited for my response after she informed me that she wanted to quit being a house parent. Sighing, I said, “I think we need a time-out. It is not good to make a decision like this in the midst of anger and hurt.” I didn’t have the answers, and I needed time to sort through everything before making a decision.

Shaking her head, Vilma cried, “I can’t do this!”

“You are a good house mother and have helped many children in your home. They need you. There’s an answer for this, but we need more time to get it resolved.” I explained my idea to move Karla into a neutral home for a couple of days until we devised a plan.

I checked with another couple who already knew the problems with Karla. They agreed to open their home to her, and Karla moved in temporarily.

IMG_2240From the beginnings of the orphanage, we set a precedent that the children would not be moved around from one family to another. These children need stability. In real family relationships, the family learns to work through the problems. If a child acts out, she faces the consequences with the parents, and they work with her. The child experiences the discipline and love of the growing-up process. Moving a child from one family to another would provoke instability and insecurity. That described their before-Shadow lives, but at Shadow we provide consistency.

At Shadow we keep siblings together and we don’t want them to be in separate orphanages. Often the court will transfer a child to us because a sibling resides at Shadow. Even the court system stands firm on the idea of siblings remaining together. Placing them in the same home at Shadow establishes a stronger family and a sense of belonging. In the case of these two teens, each had a sister in the home with them.

When I woke from the dream and heard the words “switch them,” I knew what we had to do. I called the couples into the office and explained what I heard the Lord saying.

“It has been our policy not to move children from one home to another, but perhaps it is time for an exception. I think the Lord has opened my eyes to this idea for this particular circumstance. If it doesn’t turn out favorably, we will come together and work on a different solution. What do you think? Do you agree?”

The parents’ smiles, nods, and the look of relief filling their faces confirmed that this plan could be the answer.

The next day the two girls changed homes. Susy* and Karla knew this would be their last opportunity to stay at Shadow. I told them they would begin in their new families with a clean slate. I established the rule that neither set of house parents could talk negatively about their former daughter or bring up things from the past.

After the girls moved in with their new families, I nervously waited for feedback. The reports started to come in a week later. “We found out that Karla likes to sing,” the house father said with a grin. The house mother added, “They gather around Papa and sing songs almost every evening. It is a blessing to hear them.”

Encouraging words of positive progress continued to come in. Susy wouldn’t talk to her previous house parents but opened up to the new ones. I marveled at how the Lord worked it out. The tension and stress of the house parents lessened, and peace reigned. I could only guess what would have happened if we hadn’t acted on the words: “Switch them.”

*Names have been changed

Switch Them: Part 1

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Loud words woke me up: “Switch them!” Coming out of a groggy state, I heard them again: “Switch them!” I chuckled because I knew that the Lord had given me an answer to a situation that had hung over us for a year. There are always going to be problems with personalities and relationships in any group of people. This problem involved two sets of house parents and two rebellious, uncooperative teenagers. Neither case related to the other, except for the continual attitude problems of the girls.

The first couple met with us to say they couldn’t have Susy* in their home any longer. She disrupted the lives of the other eleven girls and their own biological three with her attitude and disobedience. As I listened to the husband state their situation, his wife’s eyes pleaded with Joanne and I to come up with an answer. They had talked with, counseled, and prayed for this child for months. Suggestions from others were acted upon, but nothing worked. We saw their desperation but explained that the only option left would be to transfer the girl to another orphanage.

The house parents left the meeting with the weight of their hearts holding them to a slow walk. They felt they couldn’t let Susy leave Shadow. That meant separation from her older sister, who would remain in their home.

Didn’t God have a plan of some kind? My heart cried out for an answer.

The second couple also dealt with a difficult girl. I didn’t know it at the time, but they were leaning toward leaving the orphanage as house parents. As I talked and prayed with them, I could see the struggle in Vilma* as she dealt with the disrespect, abusive words, and attitudes.

Both couples continued to pray for their situations. Lord, show me what we can do. These parents are good people, and yet they are being torn apart by these two girls. I fought my frustration and the lack of answers.

IMG_2340Late one afternoon I was getting out of my car, and as the garage door went down, a call came in. The house father demanded I get back to the orphanage immediately. In my weariness, I asked the Lord for wisdom and energy as I drove back. I entered the house to an angry house father who jerked the door open for me; a jaw-clenching, red-faced girl sitting on a bunk bed; and a teary-eyed house mother who sat on another bed.

“Tell me what happened,” I asked, not really wanting to hear the story. It would be a similar story from the past, and I didn’t know what to do. Lord, I need to see this situation with Your eyes. I don’t have the answers, but You do.

“I can’t do this anymore! I’m done!” blurted out Vilma. “I can’t be a house mother any longer. I quit.” The battle with Karla*, filled with rebellious explosions, had gone on for several days.

For the sake of everyone involved, decisions had to be made now. Would we let these qualified house parents leave over one child? Karla had been a part of the orphanage for several years but had turned into a tyrant when she entered puberty. Was it time for the stress filled house parents to quit, or should the girl leave? My thoughts had taken several twists and turns before I had any answer.

*Name has been changed.