Author Archives: Carroll

Strategies for Overcoming Fear

5 Replies

Manifestations in the demonic realm seemed continuous and kept us all on alert. I learned to recognize a certain look of darkness in the eyes of a girl. If I called out her name to look at me and had her say, “I am a child of Jesus,” the trance would come to an abrupt halt. Dealing with fear presented another issue. Lorena* went through several months struggling with trances and fear. All of us workers in the Shadow of His Wings Orphanage showed the girls strategies for overcoming fear.

“Mama Carroll, I need to talk to you,” Lorena quietly spoke with a catch in her throat.

I told her to come into my room and sit down. “What is the problems, mi amor?”

“I-I-I’m scared to go into the bathroom.” She had my full attention with this announcement and continued to explain. “When I go in, I’m afraid a snake is going to come up out of the toilet, or when I am in the shower, I feel like the water will turn to blood. I’m afraid to go to the bathroom at night, and last night I almost wet the bed.” The anxious look on this sixteen year old’s face told me of the seriousness of the situation. Lord, please give me some insight for this situation. How can I help Lorena?

I wondered what had provoked these thoughts. We didn’t allow the girls to watch movies other than the good Disney types. Perhaps she was reliving something from the past. Fear haunts the lives of these children, just as it does in the life of every living person. The degree of fear varies, but the big question loomed in front of me: how to deal with it. These kids had been exposed to witchcraft and satanic rituals. Many had viewed horror movies and brutalities on the streets or in their homes, so one can understand the strength of the fear factor. I could only share with the kids the strategies I used to deal with my fears and explain how to protect their minds.

“Have you experienced a time when any of these things have happened to you? Has a snake appeared in the bathroom or has there been blood?” I asked.

I heard a meek “no.”

“The enemy is attacking your mind. God hasn’t given you a spirit of fear but of love, power, and a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7). We read some Scriptures about fear and God’s promise of protection. We took authority in the name of Jesus, but I knew from experience that victory would be a process of learning to trust the Lord and what He promised. What a horrible feeling to have your heart racing and your imagination in over-drive, with the hopeless feeling of being alone.

“Lorena, when you begin to feel fear, immediately say Jesus aloud. Say it as many times as necessary until you feel peace coming into your heart. You know many Scriptures that say He is your protector and that He will hide you from the enemy. The Lord wants you to know you can trust Him and that He is always with you.”

Afterwards I purchased a flashlight, and I gave it to Lorena, suggesting that she keep it hidden under her mattress. Things like that had a way of getting stolen. She gratefully took it for any future nighttime ventures into the dark bathroom. She had permission to awaken me in the night if she needed me to pray for her. I told her it would be good to find a praise song to sing while she used the bathroom. Would she trust the Lord for His protection?

The next morning Lorena went to take a shower. I listened for a song but didn’t hear anything. “Lorena?”

“What?” she shouted back.

“Yo tengo gozo gozo gozo en mi corazón.” (I have joy joy joy in my heart.)

I chuckled when I received back a loud, “Dónde?” (Where?)

I replied, “En mi corazón.” (In my heart.) We sang back and forth for a few more stanzas before I stopped. I felt victory when I could hear her continuing with the song.

Months later, Lorena felt that she had overcome the fear of going into the bathroom, along with some other fears that popped up at times, by using the strategies for overcoming fear. The Lord faithfully showed her that He could be trusted and that He would never leave her unprotected. All of us rejoiced with each victory that I saw in the girls.

*Name has been changed.

Deliverance From Demons: Part 3

1 Reply

IMG_1293The battle for Ester’s* deliverance from demons continued as we sought the Lord for answers in breaking the demonic hold on her. I read in Ezekiel 4 where God gave Ezekiel a plan to seize Jerusalem. I felt that we were to take siege of the orphanage—the girls and everyone who worked with us, just as Ezekiel had been commanded for Jerusalem. I looked up “siege” in the dictionary and boiled it down to fit our situation. “Siege” meant to make a continuous effort to gain all of the children and all associated with the orphanage for the Lord. In Isaiah 61, God said He would set the captives free. Jesus Christ gave believers the authority over the enemy, and we declared that over Ester.

After destroying all of the jewelry, we led Ester through the Bible and shared about the hope and love that is hers from the Lord. She admitted that she desired that kind of love. I had her read Scriptures of truth, inserting her name in the sentences to personalize the words. All the girls needed to know that it is our identity in Christ that gives us the authority to ask God for anything. We are no longer captives or slaves but God’s children (Galatians 4:7-9). As Ester grew into a deeper understanding of what being a child of God meant, she repented and denounced being the bride of Satan. It took time, love, words of encouragement from “Word Planters,” prayer, and reading God’s Word, but gradually this young girl accepted the Lord’s love and became a pillar of strength. Ester shined with the knowledge that she was somebody special in the eyes of her Creator.

Ester needed to be prepared for when she left the orphanage, knowing how to stand in the authority the Lord gave her. I talked to her about temptations and the pull back into her old life. We discussed how she could come against them with the Bible truths that had been planted in her heart. What blessed me more than anything was when I saw her ministering to other girls, with her Bible open and words of truth pouring out of her mouth. Many of the girls who had received deliverance did the same. They were set free from their old lives and ministered to the new girls out of their new lives in Christ.

After each situation of spiritual confrontation, I found myself becoming bolder in the authority Christ gave us. I used to feel the hair stand up on the back of my neck, but I found myself ready for battle, knowing that we already had victory. We only needed to fight the battle with the weapons our gracias Lord gave us. We continued to teach the girls that they too have the authority and can put an end to the manifestations. I put this teaching as a top priority, because they would not always be with us, and using their God-given authority would bring victory. The world is filled with darkness, and for these girls knowing how to walk in authority helps free others from bondage. These children make a difference in this wicked world. Of course, it’s a process of learning for all of us, and it excites me to know they can walk in peace, love, and victory. None of the children were too young to learn how to break the bondage of the enemy and walk in the freedom of the Lord.

*Name has been changed.

The Key Revealed: Part 2

1 Reply

IMG_0017We watched this twelve-year-old go in and out of trances, with screaming and times of vomiting. We prayed and took authority in the name of Jesus, but we didn’t see the deliverance that Ester* needed. Lord, help us to uncover the reason this is happening to her. Why does the enemy have such a hold on her? We need the key revealed so that we can close the door to the enemy. 

“Ester, the enemy is playing with your mind, but somehow there is a door open to the spiritual realm for that to happen. Can you tell us anything that would help us understand what is going on with you?” I asked. She looked at me with blank eyes, trying to comprehend what I said.

Walter* watched her closely and then looked down at some bracelets on her wrists. “What are the meaning of these bracelets?” he inquired.

“They are satanic,” she said. Then she pointed out her ring and necklace and explained that they also symbolized satanic beliefs. “People in the gang gave them to me.” She continued to tell her story of feeling unloved by a family who drank liquor and used drugs. They encouraged her to participate in those things, and the father even brought home glue for her to sniff. “I wanted peace and love in my life, and that drew me into the gang. They accepted me and treated me like they cared.”

I shuddered as she described the gang’s symbol: a tattoo of three triangular dots. To have the brand of this satanic group signified a lifetime commitment, and they would kill anyone trying to leave the gang. Thank goodness, the police picked up Ester from the streets the day she was scheduled to receive her tattoo. Her next words made my blood run cold. “The gang chose me to be the bride of Satan,” she said with fear flickering in her eyes. Ester quickly scanned the room, as though watching for something or someone. “I thought that Satan loved me, so I gave myself to him.”

I knew enough about satanic rituals to know that such a position put her life in danger. The spiritual dynamics of being the bride of Satan explained the tremendous fear we saw exhibited by Ester. With the key to the manifestations now exposed, we needed to have the Lord’s wisdom and guidance as to how to proceed for her deliverance. Since Ester had consented to allow this in her life, she had to denounce the demons of darkness and break the enemy’s hold on her life. I trusted the Lord to lead us in the way this would happen. I also had another concern. Lord, keep us safe here at the orphanage. These gang members could easily find out where we live and try to get Ester back with them. Give us the wisdom to break all of this off of her.

After hearing Ester’s story, I felt shaken to the point that I lacked words, so I gave her a hug. Then I sought out my secret place of prayer with the Lord to see what the He had planned for this special child. Were we in for a huge battle? I didn’t know what to expect, but I believed in the Lord for Ester’s deliverance.

*Name has been changed.

Demonic Manifestation: Part 1

2 Replies

Spiritual battles and demonic manifestations plagued the girls, who knowingly or unknowingly had been involved in such things before coming into Shadow of His Wings Orphanage. Having had some experience in the deliverance ministry before I came to the mission field saved my sanity and kept me from the fear that comes with dealing in the spiritual realm. I saw what the power of the name Jesus did when spoken out loud. Girls found peace when they declared that Jesus Christ was their Lord and Savior. Nevertheless, this learning curve continued to rise sharply as the staff at Shadow learned the process of breaking off the stronghold of the enemy from these children, according to the promises in the Bible.

Another side of the battle dealt with cultural ideas and old wives’ tales. Pouring holy oil down someone’s throat who is screaming and vomiting does nothing but make the victim miserable. Everything we did needed to be in line with what God intended. Several of the people who worked with us needed to be taught the scriptural ways of deliverance. I might have seen many situations in the past, but I had much more to learn from those who had more experience than I.

In one occurrence, the girls were having devotions when I walked in. Ester* slid to the floor and began screaming, fighting, and vomiting. She fought hard, trying to grab my face when I knelt beside her to pray and calm her down. Ester came out of her trance briefly, recognized me, and then clung to me trembling. I needed to get some help, so I told the house father, Walter*, to talk with her. He had helped in similar situations before and knew what to do. I called Joanne to come assist us with this violent demonic manifestation. Meanwhile, Ester kept going in and out of trances, not knowing those around her, with wild eyes screaming for help. We lost our calm night, and I didn’t think we were gaining any ground in the area of spiritual warfare. We all prayed continually for God’s covering and protection, while we calmed everyone else down and sent them to bed. Ester stayed in the room with the house parents so they could keep an eye on her, even though she had gone into a deep sleep.

The next morning a pounding on my door woke me up with a start. The house mother told me that throughout the night Ester had continued in and out of trances, with bouts of body shaking and crying out in fear. I walked into the dining room to see her. She sat with her head leaned back against the wall, with listless eyes opened. She was totally out of it. She looked dead. Walter and I took her into the bedroom, removing her from the other children. Lord, give us discernment and wisdom. How do we get her free from all of this? While praying, I called out her name several times. With a jerk and a scream, she threw herself into my arms, her body heaving as I spoke. “Ester, you are safe with angels all around you. Jesus is with you, and He will not let any harm come to you.” Walter and I took authority over any further demonic manifestations, declaring Jesus as Lord and Savior.

We needed to find out why the enemy demonstrated so strongly through her. She had the key, and we needed to help her find it. It would be another time when I hadn’t been prepared for the response Ester gave us nor the revelation of the key.

*Name has been changed.