My life progressed in a good direction. I felt in-sync being an elementary teacher in eastern Montana, and especially as I worked with kids who hated to read. I felt comfortable with church involvement, at school, and in a family oriented community. However, there was a stirring in the atmosphere, and I knew it meant changes were coming. That is to be expected if one says to the Lord, “I’ll go where you want me to and do what you want me to do.” I don’t know how many other millions of people have said that prayer, but I’ll tell you what, the Lord hears it and He responds.
There are times when the Lord shows me a piece of the future in a dream. I remember two years before this that Dad and I went shopping and entered a greeting card store. “Oh my goodness! That’s the mountain in my dream,” I exclaimed. Dad patiently waited for me to explain myself.
“I dreamed I looked out a picture window at a looming mountain covered with rocks and dirt just a short distance from the house. It was raining in hurricane torrents. Through sheets of downpour, I could see water squirting out of the cracks and crevices, which formed mini-cascades all over the slopes. Particles of rocks rolled to the bottom, building a pile of stones. I looked at the rubble below and said that I was going gold hunting, and I knew where to find the good stuff. In the dream, I knew the gold represented something precious. Then, I saw a huge hole in the mountain revealing a beautiful green valley. It looked like paradise.”
Dad bought me the card that day. I framed it, and it hangs in my home as a reminder of a God who leads me according to His plans for me.
One Sunday, a couple shared their perspective of the mission field. The husband told how he ate grubs so he could be accepted by this tribe. I smugly thought, Lord I’m sure glad you didn’t call me to be a missionary. Smack! Immediately, I remembered my words of being willing to go anywhere and do anything. Oh boy! I did it this time. After the service, just to make up for the contrary thoughts, I asked the couple if there was a need for teachers on the mission field. I can still hear their laughter as they announced that this was the number-one need. The seed was planted.
I couldn’t shake off the idea of teaching on a mission field, so I took the next step and talked to the pastor and his wife. Then, I contacted a missionary friend, who was in Africa. Armed with council and advice, I fasted and prayed to see what the Lord was saying to me. I thought of the mountain dream and my desire to minister to hurting children. I counseled with young teens in my community and saw into their scared hearts. I heard the need for someone to listen and encourage them. The seed germinated.
The whole process of events was like trying to find that proverbial light switch in a pitch-black room. Doubts would come and go, but I stood firm on the idea that I wanted to be involved in the lives of needy children. The door opened for me to teach missionary children at a school in San Cristobal, a suburb of Guatemala City, Guatemala.
I faced a test in trust. Would God meet my needs if I gave up the security that was already mine? At fifty-two, would I be able to learn a new language? Hundreds of questions filled my thoughts as I looked at pictures on my walls and saw faces of loved ones that I would be leaving behind. Granny’s trunk sat in the crowded living room. She used that trunk when she moved from Kentucky to Montana as a girl; a treasure to me that held memories. Could I give up my treasures if I committed my life to being a missionary? The process went on until I answered God’s call: Yes, Lord, I will go.
All four of my children had left the nest, and that made it easier to pull up stakes and leave a satisfied life behind. This single missionary found herself in Guatemala one year later. The seed turned into a flowering plant.
Have you faced a step-off-the-plank-into-the-broiling-water event? Or are you looking at one today wondering what to do? I’d love to hear about your experience and how you dealt with it. Sharing our thoughts can be an encouragement for whatever we are going through. Drop me a note in the comment box, and I will respond.
Carroll,
I am very excited about the blog and your upcoming book. The Shadow of His Wings has changed so many lives, including mine. I cannot imagine what my life would be like without my Shadow of His Wings experiences.
Corey
Thanks for your note Corey. I can testify to your testimonies because you have shared them. Shadow and kids are “life changers.”
Congrats on launching your first blog post! As for me, I’ve had a few stepping off points. The one that started the decades-long filling of passport pages began in 1984. Like you, I had been enjoying my work in the hospital when God’s nudge interrupted life as I’d known it. I’ve never regretted accepting His call–also, same as you.
Amen! I had the advantage because you were there with helpful and wise advice:) God has a way of getting us were we need to be.
Carroll,
Thank you for sharing your story! It’s encouraging and inspiring! A great reminder that everyday there is the potential to surrender to the Lord and he can move mightily through us for His glory!
I appreciate your note and encouragement Jim. May the Lord always receive the glory.
My first emotion when I looked at your blog moved me to tears of great joy! I can only imagine the Secret Place of our Papa being filled with delight when He beholds the beauty of you 🙂 My imagination also takes me to the window of heaven being filled with Mom, Granny and many others who have gone before us looking at your blog with shouts of joy and praise. Sis, you are an inspiration for God’s Own. You raised four beautiful children and now you are raising up God’s Army!
Your words bring tears to my eyes Sis. It’s a delight for me to have you be such a big part of all this. You’ve been there for me in many ways and I have thanked our Lord for you many times over.
Carroll-I remember the first time I met you as I was beginning to ask myself those same questions. It was the first stirrings in my heart about going where God called and doing what He asked. Little did I know I would end up at Shadow of His Wings a year later and stay for four years. I was surprised when I felt God calling me back to the states, but I am working on the reservation with middle school students and it is amazing what God is doing here. I feel like I am on a mission field but it is right in my own backyard. I am so inspired by your writing and dedication to write this book. I think I told you I felt that nudge from the Lord to do the same thing this year. At this point I am just putting together some of the reflections I wrote while I was in Guatemala. It was amazing all that the Lord revealed being there where the presence of God was so strong. I look forward to reading more and maybe I can share a few snippets of what I am writing with you. Big Hugs. Miss you all very much.
Charlene we were so blessed to have you here for those years but God knew where you needed to go from here. Those middle school kids have needs you can minister to with your love and expertise. It is a mission field and you are smack dab in the middle of it. It is good that you are writing down your reflections because I can see you writing a book some day and those things will help jog your memory of important events and issues. I’d love for you to share those ideas when you get ready. I can also point you into the direction of what a modern day writer needs to do. It’s become a bit complicated. Stay strong in our Lord as He guides you down that path of your life. We miss you. Much love and blessings to you.
Hi Carol –
I love that you are documenting your journey for us all to read. I’ve had many of these “moments” myself and love how the Lord leads us to the perfect place at the perfect time:)
Hi Charity, God is so good to us isn’t He. We can be a major encouragement to each other when we share of those times. You are so right, His timing is perfect. I’m still learning that one:)